Late last Saturday night , a young chap was
walking home from the pub.
It was a cold, wet, windy evening, and he was tired and freezing.
Most of the street lights in the area were broken, and the silence was
only broken by the occasional sound of a stray cat sifting through a wheelie
bin.
Then suddenly he heard a strange noise.......
BUMP........
BUMP........
BUMP........
BUMP........
Startled by this, he turned, and to his amazement, through the driving
rain, he saw the faint outline of a large box turning into his road.
BUMP........
BUMP........
BUMP........
He froze to the spot, he couldn't believe his eyes, as the box approached from
the shadows, he was able to make out its shape more clearly.... It was a
coffin...!
Not wanting anything to do with this, he put his head down and started walking
briskly home.
BUMP........
BUMP........
BUMP........
BUMP........
He could feel the coffin gaining on him, he started walking faster.........
BUMP........BUMP.......
BUMP........BUMP.......
BUMP........BUMP.......
BUMP........BUMP.......
The coffin was closing with his every step, he started to jog, but he heard the
coffin speed up after him......
BUMP........BUMP...BUMP...
BUMP........BUMP...BUMP...
BUMP........BUMP...BUMP...
He started to sprint, but so did the coffin .
BUMP...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP.....
BUMP...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP.....
BUMP...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP.....
Eventually he made it to his front door, but he knew the coffin was only
seconds behind. Fumbling around in his pocket, he pulled out his keys, His hand
trembling, he managed to open the lock, he dived inside slamming the front door
behind him. He shot into his front room, and slumped into his comfy chair.
Suddenly there was a loud crash, as the coffin smashed its way through the
front door. The force of the impact
broke the lock off the coffin allowing the lid to swing freely on its
rusty hinges as it continued its chase.....
BUMP...SCREACH...BUMP...SCREACH...
BUMP...SCREACH...BUMP...SCREACH...
BUMP...SCREACH...BUMP...SCREACH...
BUMP...SCREACH...BUMP...SCREACH...
In horror the young lad fled again, as fast as his shaking legs could take him
he bolted upstairs to the bathroom and locked the door........
BUMP...SCREACH...HOP...BUMP...SCREACH...HOP...
BUMP...SCREACH...HOP...BUMP...SCREACH...HOP...
BUMP...SCREACH...HOP...BUMP...SCREACH...HOP...
The coffin again gave chase up the stairs, across the landing and launched itself
at the bathroom door. With an almighty smash, the bathroom door flew off its
hinges.....
The coffin stood in the doorway, then started to approach the young terrified
lad.
BUMP...SCREACH...BUMP...SCREACH...
BUMP...SCREACH...BUMP...SCREACH...
BUMP...SCREACH...BUMP...SCREACH...
In a last ditch attempt to save his skin, he reached for his bathroom
cabinet......
He grabbed a bar of Imperial Leather soap and threw it at the coffin.......
Still it came........!
BUMP...SCREACH...BUMP...SCREACH...
He grabbed his can of Lynx deodorant and threw it........ Still it came......!
BUMP...SCREACH...BUMP...SCREACH...
He grabbed his first aid kit and threw it...... Still it came......!
BUMP...SCREACH...BUMP...SCREACH...
He grabbed some Benadryl cough mixture and threw it........
The coffin stopped.
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